Veteran's Day

I've been a little silent lately.  I've found it's taking some time to get me to feel like myself again.  I thought a couple of Fridays ago, I was there. But I was wrong.  I've been moody, depressed, tired. Like I don't want to go anywhere or do anything.

Jesse has been so supportive though.  My veteran (because if you can't say it today, when can you say it?) is the best thing that has ever happened to me.

My life changed dramatically when I started dating Jesse. Only a year and a half into our relationship, he deployed to Iraq.  That year changed me.

I was 21 years old, engaged to a soldier who was deployed to Iraq.  I lived at home with my parents, slept in a twin bed, and worked full time for a mortgage company that I hated.  I went to school part time at night and did my absolute best to stay busy.

Every now and then during that year, some commercial would come on, or a song would play on the radio, and I would stop breathing.  Even though I talked to Jesse all the time, I would constantly remind myself that something could happen. That I would have to be prepared.  That I needed to keep in contact with his father, because if something DID happen, I wouldn't even be notified.  The army doesn't care if you're dating, if you're engaged, only if you're married or a blood relative.  One of my worst fears during that time was Jesse would be killed and I wouldn't know it until much, much later because no one would notify me.  And I would just be wondering where he was or what he was doing. And then some call would come in days later with the worst news.

But Jesse came home. We moved in together. We got married. We bought a house.  And I remind myself every day, not just on veteran's day, that none of that would have been possible if our men and women just gave up the fight. If everyone decided to lay down arms, not risk anything or sacrifice themselves for my freedom.  If those men and women weren't selfless, I wouldn't have everything I count on today.  So I thank not only my gorgeous husband, but two of his brothers, both of his grandfathers, both of my grandfathers, one of my uncles, many of my friends, and countless others that joined, fought, and came home to their loved ones.  Thank you. Thank you for everything.